my heart is now just sort of confused but is definitely not aching. Whoops.
Oct 13, 2009
Oct 12, 2009
The Boyfriend and I are taking a 1 month break.
We both need to figure out what we want, and how happy we really are with each other, and this was the best way I could think to do it without just breaking up all together. A break just gives us a little more hope, I think. Who knows, this'll probably only last like a week, but still. We just need some time to reassess.
We both need to figure out what we want, and how happy we really are with each other, and this was the best way I could think to do it without just breaking up all together. A break just gives us a little more hope, I think. Who knows, this'll probably only last like a week, but still. We just need some time to reassess.
Oct 11, 2009
Ugh ugh ugh.
I don't think I'll ever be able to be in a relationship with someone without ending up liking someone else... Is there something wrong with me?
I started thinking about crushes, likes, loves and whatever this week. I realized that I could see myself liking/dating almost any of my guy friends. And I was thinking about arranged marriages too, and how it seems like people who have arranged marriages end up falling in love and being happy a lot of the time. I mean, they're at least into each other enough to make babies, ya? So... my thinking here is that really all you need is a friendship and the rest will follow if you let it. It's all about availability and timing, for the most part. I feel like I could go anywhere and find someone who I'd be willing to date and eventually marry.
It's a little less simple than that, of course. Like, I don't want to marry someone who hates music or is mean to me or something like that... but if that's all it takes, then I could honestly see myself marrying any guy who is just a friend to me.
If you're a guy and you're my friend, don't worry, it doesn't mean I have a crush on you. I just think it wouldn't be completely absurd for us to date or get married, probably.
♥
I don't think I'll ever be able to be in a relationship with someone without ending up liking someone else... Is there something wrong with me?
I started thinking about crushes, likes, loves and whatever this week. I realized that I could see myself liking/dating almost any of my guy friends. And I was thinking about arranged marriages too, and how it seems like people who have arranged marriages end up falling in love and being happy a lot of the time. I mean, they're at least into each other enough to make babies, ya? So... my thinking here is that really all you need is a friendship and the rest will follow if you let it. It's all about availability and timing, for the most part. I feel like I could go anywhere and find someone who I'd be willing to date and eventually marry.
It's a little less simple than that, of course. Like, I don't want to marry someone who hates music or is mean to me or something like that... but if that's all it takes, then I could honestly see myself marrying any guy who is just a friend to me.
If you're a guy and you're my friend, don't worry, it doesn't mean I have a crush on you. I just think it wouldn't be completely absurd for us to date or get married, probably.
♥
Oct 10, 2009
Dear Creative Writing teacher,
You teach at a private school. Thus, you should probably stop posting things on your Twitter and Facebook like links to your stand-up comedy routine in which you swear, or jokes about wet T-Shirt contests, or anything involving the word "dick" unless it's in reference to someone named Richard.
I really don't want you to get in trouble or fired, because, quite frankly, you are probably the coolest teacher I have this year.
Sincerely,
Your student.
You teach at a private school. Thus, you should probably stop posting things on your Twitter and Facebook like links to your stand-up comedy routine in which you swear, or jokes about wet T-Shirt contests, or anything involving the word "dick" unless it's in reference to someone named Richard.
I really don't want you to get in trouble or fired, because, quite frankly, you are probably the coolest teacher I have this year.
Sincerely,
Your student.
I'm going to go read this book right now.
:)
Yay for my school getting all of us seniors free copies! Connections rock! Wheeeee...
:)
Yay for my school getting all of us seniors free copies! Connections rock! Wheeeee...
Oct 9, 2009
UGH.
I don't even know why but this just set me off...
I was in class with a couple of my friends. I was even having a really good day so far. Then, we started talking about our two friends who are also a couple, and they were talking about how they no longer like the male side of the couple, and I was trying to defend him in his boyness (since boys generally are kind of dumb... at least at our age... no offense, teeheehee). Nothing really came of that conversation, it just sorta switched to something else, which was fine. THEN, I started talking about this friend (male) who I am planning on chilling with this weekend. All of a sudden my friends are telling me that I cannot date him (well one friend, really, the other was just sort of there when it was happening and just nodded along for the most part). Hello, I am already dating someone... Sure, I might *happen* to look adorable while I hang out with this friend, but so what? No big deal.
So then my friends (again, mostly just the one) start saying how they don't like this guy and how they've only heard bad things about him. I ask if they actually know him personally, and go figure, the answer is NO. Guess who does know him personally? ME. Just because you know his ex-girlfriend who had ONE bad story about him (which could have very well been blown WAY out of proportion, especially since it "happened" like 2 years ago) doesn't mean you know everything about him. He's never done anything mean to me, and since I've known him, he's actually been a pretty fantastic friend. He helped me out a lot just by BEING THERE FOR ME this week, and I thought maybe this would be a good time to try and get together more.
So yeah, I guess it wasn't a huge deal, but I just completely shut down after this. I started doodling/writing in my notebook about how judgmental my friends (mostly with one in mind, not really the other, to reiterate again) and then my one friend starts passing me notes like "I love you" and "you're pretty" and whatever. I don't care what you think of me, and I don't care if you choose not to like some of the people I'm friends with, but don't act as if you know them so well that you can criticize them and then act like I'm crazy to want to be friends with them. UGH.
-_-
The rest of my day was spent mostly avoiding/ignoring the one friend. I was fine with the other, 'cause she is generally way awesome and wasn't really contributing to the hatin' and such. It'll all be blown over by the next time I see her, so I guess it's fine. I just... ugh, especially since the more I think about it, she complains about a LOT of people, so I hate to think what she says about me. (Not to say that I don't participate in my fair share of gossip, but still... yikes.)
/end rant.
THIS IS GOING TO BE AN AWESOME WEEKEND!
♥
I don't even know why but this just set me off...
I was in class with a couple of my friends. I was even having a really good day so far. Then, we started talking about our two friends who are also a couple, and they were talking about how they no longer like the male side of the couple, and I was trying to defend him in his boyness (since boys generally are kind of dumb... at least at our age... no offense, teeheehee). Nothing really came of that conversation, it just sorta switched to something else, which was fine. THEN, I started talking about this friend (male) who I am planning on chilling with this weekend. All of a sudden my friends are telling me that I cannot date him (well one friend, really, the other was just sort of there when it was happening and just nodded along for the most part). Hello, I am already dating someone... Sure, I might *happen* to look adorable while I hang out with this friend, but so what? No big deal.
So then my friends (again, mostly just the one) start saying how they don't like this guy and how they've only heard bad things about him. I ask if they actually know him personally, and go figure, the answer is NO. Guess who does know him personally? ME. Just because you know his ex-girlfriend who had ONE bad story about him (which could have very well been blown WAY out of proportion, especially since it "happened" like 2 years ago) doesn't mean you know everything about him. He's never done anything mean to me, and since I've known him, he's actually been a pretty fantastic friend. He helped me out a lot just by BEING THERE FOR ME this week, and I thought maybe this would be a good time to try and get together more.
So yeah, I guess it wasn't a huge deal, but I just completely shut down after this. I started doodling/writing in my notebook about how judgmental my friends (mostly with one in mind, not really the other, to reiterate again) and then my one friend starts passing me notes like "I love you" and "you're pretty" and whatever. I don't care what you think of me, and I don't care if you choose not to like some of the people I'm friends with, but don't act as if you know them so well that you can criticize them and then act like I'm crazy to want to be friends with them. UGH.
-_-
The rest of my day was spent mostly avoiding/ignoring the one friend. I was fine with the other, 'cause she is generally way awesome and wasn't really contributing to the hatin' and such. It'll all be blown over by the next time I see her, so I guess it's fine. I just... ugh, especially since the more I think about it, she complains about a LOT of people, so I hate to think what she says about me. (Not to say that I don't participate in my fair share of gossip, but still... yikes.)
/end rant.
THIS IS GOING TO BE AN AWESOME WEEKEND!
♥
Oct 7, 2009
I put this in paper form under the flags of a bunch of mailboxes in my neighborhood. I'm slightly altering for this blog. So yeah.
WAIT! Before you just ignore this post, take a minute to just look it over. I’m not asking for money, for help, for anything but a little bit of time and an email response if you feel so led. (This first chunk is a poem I wrote for class, and the rest of it goes with it.)
Father and daughter
Sweep their feet along the dirty street.
With nothing, they search
For even scraps;
No better than the alley cats.
Not one penny to their names,
Nothing but their torn and tattered clothes,
Wishing for winter to never come.
They are the least.
You lie there,
Body broken by aching disease.
You cry out for healing,
For peace.
And yet you remain weak,
Consumed by thoughts of your own pain.
You beg and plea
For just a little more time; more life.
You are the least.
I see nothing but my life,
Self-absorbed and uncaring,
I hope against all hope
For happiness.
And yet I am so unwilling
To open my eyes to the life outside.
I remain wrapped up in my own problems,
Just barely beginning to want to unravel.
I am the least.
Who are the LEAST?
The least are people in the world who have some kind of problem. Thus, each person is among the least. Some are poor, diseased, in jail… but others are just sad, lonely, or lost. Others yet deal with problems like anger, conceit, or habitual lying. Every person is the least, and every person has been affected by the least. I invite YOU to email me at HowAmILeast@gmail.com and tell me something about your experience with the least.
Some questions you could answer: How are you the least? How have you been affected by the least? How can you help the least? If you’d like, you can even ask me about the Least or about this project. Lastly, pass this on to a friend if you want!
What is LEAST?
LEAST is a production put on by my school which is made up of a play interspersed with student art pieces, as well as a gallery for student art. All the pieces of artwork, like poems, paintings, or videos, as well as the play, are all connected to this idea of who the Least are. The driving force behind it all is this Bible verse: Matthew 25:40 "The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' Ask me if you'd like more information.
Why am I doing this?
This paper is the result of a school project, but it’s more than that. It’s an attempt to talk about how every person is hurting in some way, and how we can all help. It’s also an invitation to anyone to check out the LEAST program at my school. The responses I receive will be compiled and presented to my class, and then maybe to the rest of the school. It will be completely anonymous (unless you really WANT to be known).
WAIT! Before you just ignore this post, take a minute to just look it over. I’m not asking for money, for help, for anything but a little bit of time and an email response if you feel so led. (This first chunk is a poem I wrote for class, and the rest of it goes with it.)
The Least
Father and daughter
Sweep their feet along the dirty street.
With nothing, they search
For even scraps;
No better than the alley cats.
Not one penny to their names,
Nothing but their torn and tattered clothes,
Wishing for winter to never come.
They are the least.
You lie there,
Body broken by aching disease.
You cry out for healing,
For peace.
And yet you remain weak,
Consumed by thoughts of your own pain.
You beg and plea
For just a little more time; more life.
You are the least.
I see nothing but my life,
Self-absorbed and uncaring,
I hope against all hope
For happiness.
And yet I am so unwilling
To open my eyes to the life outside.
I remain wrapped up in my own problems,
Just barely beginning to want to unravel.
I am the least.
Who are the LEAST?
The least are people in the world who have some kind of problem. Thus, each person is among the least. Some are poor, diseased, in jail… but others are just sad, lonely, or lost. Others yet deal with problems like anger, conceit, or habitual lying. Every person is the least, and every person has been affected by the least. I invite YOU to email me at HowAmILeast@gmail.com and tell me something about your experience with the least.
Some questions you could answer: How are you the least? How have you been affected by the least? How can you help the least? If you’d like, you can even ask me about the Least or about this project. Lastly, pass this on to a friend if you want!
What is LEAST?
LEAST is a production put on by my school which is made up of a play interspersed with student art pieces, as well as a gallery for student art. All the pieces of artwork, like poems, paintings, or videos, as well as the play, are all connected to this idea of who the Least are. The driving force behind it all is this Bible verse: Matthew 25:40 "The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' Ask me if you'd like more information.
Why am I doing this?
This paper is the result of a school project, but it’s more than that. It’s an attempt to talk about how every person is hurting in some way, and how we can all help. It’s also an invitation to anyone to check out the LEAST program at my school. The responses I receive will be compiled and presented to my class, and then maybe to the rest of the school. It will be completely anonymous (unless you really WANT to be known).
Oct 6, 2009
It is so windy, I think my house might get blown over... or maybe just blown into Oz...
Today and yesterday were rough. The Boyfriend and I almost broke up... again... but again we stayed together. We are working on fixing our problems (such as I will try to stop being mean so much and he will start listening to me better). There is one issue which cannot be solved at present. Ask if you want to know that one, it's a little too personal to post up here. Right now, we are just trying to get past it, but we'll see how it goes. Another strange thing is that now The Boyfriend is trying to "figure out what he wants" but he doesn't know how to go about doing so. He refuses to actually break up with me straight up, so I guess the option of trying to figure out what he wants through seeing other people is out. Works for me, I guess? I don't know.
I mean...Hmm...
I love him. I love him so much it's crazy. I put up with a lot of crap for him and from him. But sometimes I just take him for granted and treat him not so well... And what's worse is that I realize it EVERY SINGLE TIME and yet it's like word vomit... I just can't stop myself in time. So I'm working on it. I tend to forget that The Boyfriend is somewhat moody/sensitive, so I can't really say certain things to him that I could (jokingly, of course) say to other people. However he has no qualms with teasing me. >_< No fair! But I told him that I hate being teased, especially since, as the youngest sibling, I've had to deal with it for many many years. Hopefully he and I will both get better about that.
I hope that my being really open and vulnerable here is not too weird. I'm just trying to be honest and say what I want. I mean, that's why my facebook doesn't link to my blog. That's what I don't really tell people I know in-person about it (Maggie/Kailyn, you are special exceptions!). I like the fact that I can say nearly anything I want to (and even hold back the things I don't want to say without caring whether or not it annoys people). This blog is a very nice place for me to situate my brain every once in a while.
So hum... What else what else... I don't know. Leave me a comment and maybe I will make up a post about it for next time.
♥
Today and yesterday were rough. The Boyfriend and I almost broke up... again... but again we stayed together. We are working on fixing our problems (such as I will try to stop being mean so much and he will start listening to me better). There is one issue which cannot be solved at present. Ask if you want to know that one, it's a little too personal to post up here. Right now, we are just trying to get past it, but we'll see how it goes. Another strange thing is that now The Boyfriend is trying to "figure out what he wants" but he doesn't know how to go about doing so. He refuses to actually break up with me straight up, so I guess the option of trying to figure out what he wants through seeing other people is out. Works for me, I guess? I don't know.
I mean...Hmm...
I love him. I love him so much it's crazy. I put up with a lot of crap for him and from him. But sometimes I just take him for granted and treat him not so well... And what's worse is that I realize it EVERY SINGLE TIME and yet it's like word vomit... I just can't stop myself in time. So I'm working on it. I tend to forget that The Boyfriend is somewhat moody/sensitive, so I can't really say certain things to him that I could (jokingly, of course) say to other people. However he has no qualms with teasing me. >_< No fair! But I told him that I hate being teased, especially since, as the youngest sibling, I've had to deal with it for many many years. Hopefully he and I will both get better about that.
I hope that my being really open and vulnerable here is not too weird. I'm just trying to be honest and say what I want. I mean, that's why my facebook doesn't link to my blog. That's what I don't really tell people I know in-person about it (Maggie/Kailyn, you are special exceptions!). I like the fact that I can say nearly anything I want to (and even hold back the things I don't want to say without caring whether or not it annoys people). This blog is a very nice place for me to situate my brain every once in a while.
So hum... What else what else... I don't know. Leave me a comment and maybe I will make up a post about it for next time.
♥
Oct 2, 2009
Really sorry for the lack of updates lately. School and friends and life in general have just taken up all my time, and what they have not taken away goes to sleep. Bleh.
The Boyfriend's homecoming was fun. It was, as some would put it, "a total grindfest," however as I do not mind grinding, it was pretty fun. I especially loved the fact that "Don't Stop Believing" came on and EVERYONE started singing. :) Faaaantastic.
My homecoming week has been great. It's wonderful to be a senior. :) I've been feeling quite nostalgic, though, too... Remembering homecomings past has been amazing and yet really sad, too. This week was a lot of fun with dress days. They were:
Monday: Class color day (seniors wore purple!)
Tuesday: Backwards/Clash/Inside-out day (with a backwards class schedule!)
Wednesday: Western Day (yeehaw!)
Thursday: Masquerade Day (remember my prom dress? that + a mask = my outfit)
Friday: School spirit day (Maroon and white Snuggie, ya?)
We had yelling contests and craziness all over the place. Today, there was a 1/2day for classes, then a pep rally (which was sorta lame but I'm too blehhh right now to complain). My friends and I ended up chilling at this farm place near my house, then going back to my house b/c it was raining. We then proceeded to go to Starbucks, and then the Dollar Store (everything costs $1, go figure), and then back to school. We saw all the floats (ours was awful, but whatevs), and then decided to go inside. It was cold, raining, and just icky all-around. While the soccer games went on, my friends and I chilled in the senior lounge, then went to Steak&Shake where we ate deliciousness. We went back to school, hung out indoors again for a reeeeally long time, and finally went outside for like the last 2 minutes of the varsity soccer game. We tied and then it was fireworks time. The fireworks, as usual, were incredible. :) My friend and I ended up sobbing with each other for a minute, thinking about how it was our last homecoming and such... it was so sad... But still, a nice night.
The Boyfriend walked me to my car, we said goodnight, then he went to his car and we both drove home. Obviously, I arrived at home, since I'm writing this. :)
Hopefully that brings you up to date on my life. :D
♥
p.s. My school's very first ever dance is tomorrow! It's a square dance, yay!
The Boyfriend's homecoming was fun. It was, as some would put it, "a total grindfest," however as I do not mind grinding, it was pretty fun. I especially loved the fact that "Don't Stop Believing" came on and EVERYONE started singing. :) Faaaantastic.
My homecoming week has been great. It's wonderful to be a senior. :) I've been feeling quite nostalgic, though, too... Remembering homecomings past has been amazing and yet really sad, too. This week was a lot of fun with dress days. They were:
Monday: Class color day (seniors wore purple!)
Tuesday: Backwards/Clash/Inside-out day (with a backwards class schedule!)
Wednesday: Western Day (yeehaw!)
Thursday: Masquerade Day (remember my prom dress? that + a mask = my outfit)
Friday: School spirit day (Maroon and white Snuggie, ya?)
We had yelling contests and craziness all over the place. Today, there was a 1/2day for classes, then a pep rally (which was sorta lame but I'm too blehhh right now to complain). My friends and I ended up chilling at this farm place near my house, then going back to my house b/c it was raining. We then proceeded to go to Starbucks, and then the Dollar Store (everything costs $1, go figure), and then back to school. We saw all the floats (ours was awful, but whatevs), and then decided to go inside. It was cold, raining, and just icky all-around. While the soccer games went on, my friends and I chilled in the senior lounge, then went to Steak&Shake where we ate deliciousness. We went back to school, hung out indoors again for a reeeeally long time, and finally went outside for like the last 2 minutes of the varsity soccer game. We tied and then it was fireworks time. The fireworks, as usual, were incredible. :) My friend and I ended up sobbing with each other for a minute, thinking about how it was our last homecoming and such... it was so sad... But still, a nice night.
The Boyfriend walked me to my car, we said goodnight, then he went to his car and we both drove home. Obviously, I arrived at home, since I'm writing this. :)
Hopefully that brings you up to date on my life. :D
♥
p.s. My school's very first ever dance is tomorrow! It's a square dance, yay!
Sep 25, 2009
Geez, I haven't posted in a while (like a week!). Sorry about that.
How do you keep from killing your friends? Ha... That sounds very weird. I promise, I'm not actually homicidal... I'm just very very annoyed at two of my guy friends right now.
One of them is acting very stupid and I guess like he knows everything... I don't know how to explain it other than that.
The other... well I guess he was stupid a long time ago and I suppose is still not entirely over it? Which just annoys me because OK I ADMIT THAT I'M NOT ENTIRELY OVER IT EITHER. (You'd have to know what I'm talking about to fully understand this... but I don't want to post the whole story here.)
Bah.
In other news, I spun out/hydroplaned in the truck today! Wooo.... Scariest moment of my life, basically. It was awful. The end.
Sorry, not feeling terribly descriptive atm. Hum. IM me? PellucidRatafia.
♥
How do you keep from killing your friends? Ha... That sounds very weird. I promise, I'm not actually homicidal... I'm just very very annoyed at two of my guy friends right now.
One of them is acting very stupid and I guess like he knows everything... I don't know how to explain it other than that.
The other... well I guess he was stupid a long time ago and I suppose is still not entirely over it? Which just annoys me because OK I ADMIT THAT I'M NOT ENTIRELY OVER IT EITHER. (You'd have to know what I'm talking about to fully understand this... but I don't want to post the whole story here.)
Bah.
In other news, I spun out/hydroplaned in the truck today! Wooo.... Scariest moment of my life, basically. It was awful. The end.
Sorry, not feeling terribly descriptive atm. Hum. IM me? PellucidRatafia.
♥
Sep 18, 2009
Woooo, I have no school today!
I got my Nintendo DS! It's red and IT MATCHES MY PHONE! :D I only have Scribblenauts right now, but that is fine because it is funfunfun. Also, I think I can play Gameboy Advanced games on it? Or Gameboy... or somewhere in the middle... I don't know, need to investigate.
I was at my friend Maggie's last night for a sleepover. We went to Starbucks with our friends Lauryn and Bryan, and their friend John (Jon?), who Lauryn wanted to set up with Maggie. Woo. Anyway, we got back, went to Blockbuster, picked out this movie called Session 9 (Allan, I know you blogged about this one before), which I really didn't want to see but everyone else did, and then went back to Maggie's house.
Well we watched the movie and ate pizza. Then just generally hung out, boys left, yadda yadda. Lauryn was very awake, I suppose, so she kept talking and reading a magazine and the TV was on a music channel but it was a bit too loud, so I couldn't sleep. Once she decided to go to sleep, the lights and TV were turned off. Fairly average. I closed my eyes, snuggled up with my kitty (stuffed animal from none other than The Boyfriend) and tried to sleep. Well... I'm not sure whether or not I got any sleep... I know the lights were on until at least like 12:30, and I remember being awake for a while... so perhaps not. Anyway, one of Maggie's cats (a real one) jumped up on the couch with me and snuggled up. Still, I could not sleep, and I began to be scared.
I get sort of paranoid at night... it's really awful. I don't know if it was the movie, or the fact that we were in the basement, or just because I'm always kinda freaked out when the lights go out and I've got nothing to see/listen to, but my level of fear just kept rising. It got to be 1:30am, and I was crying and having a hard time breathing. I guess that is something along the lines of a panic attack, right? So I tried to calm down, but the freaking out and the shaking got worse, so I just woke Maggie up, told her I was going home, gathered my stuff and left.
My mom was very confused when I got home, but didn't ask me anything after I said "a panic attack or something." I went to my room, and ended up finally falling asleep at like 3am.
UGH. I only remember this happening one other time in my life, and I don't recall why, but I remember it was for an actual reason. Last night was just weird and stupid.
Blah this entry is too long! So sorry! But yeah, that is my story. Peace!
♥
I got my Nintendo DS! It's red and IT MATCHES MY PHONE! :D I only have Scribblenauts right now, but that is fine because it is funfunfun. Also, I think I can play Gameboy Advanced games on it? Or Gameboy... or somewhere in the middle... I don't know, need to investigate.
I was at my friend Maggie's last night for a sleepover. We went to Starbucks with our friends Lauryn and Bryan, and their friend John (Jon?), who Lauryn wanted to set up with Maggie. Woo. Anyway, we got back, went to Blockbuster, picked out this movie called Session 9 (Allan, I know you blogged about this one before), which I really didn't want to see but everyone else did, and then went back to Maggie's house.
Well we watched the movie and ate pizza. Then just generally hung out, boys left, yadda yadda. Lauryn was very awake, I suppose, so she kept talking and reading a magazine and the TV was on a music channel but it was a bit too loud, so I couldn't sleep. Once she decided to go to sleep, the lights and TV were turned off. Fairly average. I closed my eyes, snuggled up with my kitty (stuffed animal from none other than The Boyfriend) and tried to sleep. Well... I'm not sure whether or not I got any sleep... I know the lights were on until at least like 12:30, and I remember being awake for a while... so perhaps not. Anyway, one of Maggie's cats (a real one) jumped up on the couch with me and snuggled up. Still, I could not sleep, and I began to be scared.
I get sort of paranoid at night... it's really awful. I don't know if it was the movie, or the fact that we were in the basement, or just because I'm always kinda freaked out when the lights go out and I've got nothing to see/listen to, but my level of fear just kept rising. It got to be 1:30am, and I was crying and having a hard time breathing. I guess that is something along the lines of a panic attack, right? So I tried to calm down, but the freaking out and the shaking got worse, so I just woke Maggie up, told her I was going home, gathered my stuff and left.
My mom was very confused when I got home, but didn't ask me anything after I said "a panic attack or something." I went to my room, and ended up finally falling asleep at like 3am.
UGH. I only remember this happening one other time in my life, and I don't recall why, but I remember it was for an actual reason. Last night was just weird and stupid.
Blah this entry is too long! So sorry! But yeah, that is my story. Peace!
♥
Sep 15, 2009
KAIROS WAS AWESOME! :D
To anyone who doesn't go to my school (so that's basically everyone but Maggie & Kailyn), Kairos is basically the group of international students who are attending my school (most of whom live with host families), along with a few American students. The whole idea is just to chillax together, to make friends, talk about life, worship God a little, and so on. Tonight was my first time going, and I have to say, I loved it. It was a little awkward at first, because I didn't really know anyone aside from a couple of the other American students, but it was fairly easy to just sit down and chat with people in a group, so that was nice. I'm definitely excited to see where this thing goes throughout the year. Hmm... if you were wondering, we have students from:
China
Korea
Peru
Cuba
Zambia
aaaand maybe some more that I am forgetting... I think there are 16 or 18 international students, so it's a pretty big group, but it still was easy to get along and have a good time with everyone. Yay! :D
In other news, I got my debit card in the mail today! Huzzah! I am excited to use it on something (i.e. a DS, haha) and also to take it to France with me, which is what its original purpose was. I still have yet to memorize my pin code, teeheehee. I'll do it soon.
I guess that's all I've got for now. Peace out, homies.
♥
To anyone who doesn't go to my school (so that's basically everyone but Maggie & Kailyn), Kairos is basically the group of international students who are attending my school (most of whom live with host families), along with a few American students. The whole idea is just to chillax together, to make friends, talk about life, worship God a little, and so on. Tonight was my first time going, and I have to say, I loved it. It was a little awkward at first, because I didn't really know anyone aside from a couple of the other American students, but it was fairly easy to just sit down and chat with people in a group, so that was nice. I'm definitely excited to see where this thing goes throughout the year. Hmm... if you were wondering, we have students from:
China
Korea
Peru
Cuba
Zambia
aaaand maybe some more that I am forgetting... I think there are 16 or 18 international students, so it's a pretty big group, but it still was easy to get along and have a good time with everyone. Yay! :D
In other news, I got my debit card in the mail today! Huzzah! I am excited to use it on something (i.e. a DS, haha) and also to take it to France with me, which is what its original purpose was. I still have yet to memorize my pin code, teeheehee. I'll do it soon.
I guess that's all I've got for now. Peace out, homies.
♥
Sep 14, 2009
Ugh ugh ugh.
I hate it when my feet are too hot and I'm crying and my ribs are squished, especially when they are happening all at the same time.
-_-
On the other hand, I made a good choice tonight, and I will see how it goes. Going to test it out for a month and then reevaluate my decision afterward. (The Boyfriend and I are still together, fyi. The decision was nothing along the lines of breaking up or anything near that... just if you were wondering.) So we shall see.
I should, in theory, be getting my debit card in the mail within the next 3 days! Huzzah! I am mostly excited because then I won't have to carry around cash with me anymore, so I won't try to spend it all at once (again, in theory). I realllllly wanna get a Nintendo DS (or DSi or Lite or WHATEVER, as long as it's cheap), so I'm working on saving the smallish amount of money I have for that. Wheeee! :D
I watched this movie in my Doctrine & Apologetics class called "Lord, Save Us From Your Followers." We've actually been watching it bit by bit in class over the last week or so. I have to say, it was really good. The whole point was basically this guy walking around talking to people about Christians (sort of about Christianity, but more about the people who claim to be a part of it). What he found out (not so surprising), is that most people don't have a problem with the faith. They just have a problem with the followers. A lot of the time, Christians come off as judgmental, hypocritical, narrow-minded and so on. I've seen a fair share of this myself, and I'm sure at some points I've been guilty, too. But anyway, it was really cool, because he walked around and he just talked to people as though they were old friends, just loving them and being really cool. Most of all, he was LISTENING to what they were saying, instead of walking around preaching at everyone. Honestly, I really wish EVERYONE would listen a little more to each other. If we all loved each other a little more, and I mean loving by listening, reaching out in friendship, or even just going with the old standby of "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all," I think the world would be just a little bit better. No, it'll never be perfect, but who says we can't try to cheer things up anyway, right? So yeah, if you're interested, you should definitely get your hands on a copy of that movie... It's pretty interesting (and fairly entertaining), and I think even to people of other religions (or lack thereof), it'll be a decent watch. (If you do see/have seen it, tell me about it?) ♥
I'm getting tired and I have a little homework to do, so I'll catch you all later. Peace!
♥
I hate it when my feet are too hot and I'm crying and my ribs are squished, especially when they are happening all at the same time.
-_-
On the other hand, I made a good choice tonight, and I will see how it goes. Going to test it out for a month and then reevaluate my decision afterward. (The Boyfriend and I are still together, fyi. The decision was nothing along the lines of breaking up or anything near that... just if you were wondering.) So we shall see.
I should, in theory, be getting my debit card in the mail within the next 3 days! Huzzah! I am mostly excited because then I won't have to carry around cash with me anymore, so I won't try to spend it all at once (again, in theory). I realllllly wanna get a Nintendo DS (or DSi or Lite or WHATEVER, as long as it's cheap), so I'm working on saving the smallish amount of money I have for that. Wheeee! :D
I watched this movie in my Doctrine & Apologetics class called "Lord, Save Us From Your Followers." We've actually been watching it bit by bit in class over the last week or so. I have to say, it was really good. The whole point was basically this guy walking around talking to people about Christians (sort of about Christianity, but more about the people who claim to be a part of it). What he found out (not so surprising), is that most people don't have a problem with the faith. They just have a problem with the followers. A lot of the time, Christians come off as judgmental, hypocritical, narrow-minded and so on. I've seen a fair share of this myself, and I'm sure at some points I've been guilty, too. But anyway, it was really cool, because he walked around and he just talked to people as though they were old friends, just loving them and being really cool. Most of all, he was LISTENING to what they were saying, instead of walking around preaching at everyone. Honestly, I really wish EVERYONE would listen a little more to each other. If we all loved each other a little more, and I mean loving by listening, reaching out in friendship, or even just going with the old standby of "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all," I think the world would be just a little bit better. No, it'll never be perfect, but who says we can't try to cheer things up anyway, right? So yeah, if you're interested, you should definitely get your hands on a copy of that movie... It's pretty interesting (and fairly entertaining), and I think even to people of other religions (or lack thereof), it'll be a decent watch. (If you do see/have seen it, tell me about it?) ♥
I'm getting tired and I have a little homework to do, so I'll catch you all later. Peace!
♥
Sep 12, 2009
I seriously think I've lost my mind. -_- Ask if you want the deets... I don't even want to post them on here. Gaaahhhhhhhhh.
In other news... I have a stomach ache. Too much pop. Yuck. (That's "soda," to some of you.)
I went to my friend Rich's house today. I got lost on the way there. O.O I've never been lost in my life, at least when I've been driving. I have an excellent sense of direction... just not when there's STUPID CONSTRUCTION involved and mapquest doesn't warn me. Rassin' frassin' friggum fraggum...
Buuuuuut it was super fun. We watched (the original versions of) Halloween and Nightmare on Elm Street. Did you know they were both based in Illinois? Nightmare is based on Elm St. in WHEATON! YAY! Wes Craven went to Wheaton College, I guess... but I think he got kicked out? I'd have to go look him up to confirm that, but I won't right now because I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE IT. I have to say, the ending to Nightmare was... strange... I mean the whole movie was weird, but the ending... it's just one of those WTF moments, seriously. You should go check it out. >_<
Ummm.... nothing more to post, I suppose. Peace out.
♥
p.s. Don't forget to keep clicking on those things over there -->
In other news... I have a stomach ache. Too much pop. Yuck. (That's "soda," to some of you.)
I went to my friend Rich's house today. I got lost on the way there. O.O I've never been lost in my life, at least when I've been driving. I have an excellent sense of direction... just not when there's STUPID CONSTRUCTION involved and mapquest doesn't warn me. Rassin' frassin' friggum fraggum...
Buuuuuut it was super fun. We watched (the original versions of) Halloween and Nightmare on Elm Street. Did you know they were both based in Illinois? Nightmare is based on Elm St. in WHEATON! YAY! Wes Craven went to Wheaton College, I guess... but I think he got kicked out? I'd have to go look him up to confirm that, but I won't right now because I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE IT. I have to say, the ending to Nightmare was... strange... I mean the whole movie was weird, but the ending... it's just one of those WTF moments, seriously. You should go check it out. >_<
Ummm.... nothing more to post, I suppose. Peace out.
♥
p.s. Don't forget to keep clicking on those things over there -->
Sep 11, 2009
I found out that Imogen Heap released another album. It's called Ellipse. I hope it's amazing. I'll tell you what I think when I listen to it all the way through? Right now I am about 30 seconds into the first song, haha.
♥
p.s. I really love her a lot, hence why I want this album to be amazing.
p.p.s. Don't forget to keep clicking around on those things I posted on the right! :) It seems like such a small thing to do for such huge causes, right? Pretty exciting.
p.p.p.s. You should also check out freerice.com. I haven't played on it for a while, but I'm going to this afternoon. It's AWESOME and it gives... well, free rice, to people. Plus, it helps make you smarter. Double bonus points! SO GO CHECK IT OUT! :D
♥
p.s. I really love her a lot, hence why I want this album to be amazing.
p.p.s. Don't forget to keep clicking around on those things I posted on the right! :) It seems like such a small thing to do for such huge causes, right? Pretty exciting.
p.p.p.s. You should also check out freerice.com. I haven't played on it for a while, but I'm going to this afternoon. It's AWESOME and it gives... well, free rice, to people. Plus, it helps make you smarter. Double bonus points! SO GO CHECK IT OUT! :D
Sep 10, 2009
Sep 8, 2009
Hooooly cow, these last few days have been SO strange.
To sum it up? How could I even...?
Lots of tickling happened... LOTS of tickling.
My friend and her (ex) boyfriend broke up. Seeing her sad is really strange... she's such a happy person. I hope she's okay. =/ I love that girl. We might go visit her at her house this evening, if she is up for it. Her mom never texted me back about it... so I guess I shall just text her. No surprise, I suppose.
I just (like literally minutes ago) found an oldish friend on facebook. I didn't know if it was her at first, because when I knew her, she had dark brown hair, and her pictures show her to be blondish... but I'm pretty sure it is. If not... I guess I could just delete her, but I'm 99.9% sure it's her. So yay! Facebook can be quite exciting sometimes.
My (dad's) truck has a CD player! (I discovered this a few days ago!) It doesn't play burned CDs though. *cries* Oh well.
In theory, I'm going to hang out with The Boyfriend tomorrow. Yay! I love seeing him. :)
I'M GOING TO BUY A NINTENDO DS! (Or DS lite). Used, but still. Yay! I'm really excited because I've never bought anything this expensive with my own money before, and also because I really want a DS 'cause all the games look super fun. :) Yay yay yay! So hopefully sometime this week, I'll be able to do that. I'm still waiting on the checks from my mom/grandpa for various thingums. Yay, sort-of income!
I'm still waiting for jobs to call/email me or whatever, even if it's to tell me they've rejected me. No one has been very timely except for Target. Sad. Eventually, I will get a job!
I think that's it?
♥
EDIT: Apparently it's Blogger's 10th birthday! Wow. So they are using this SocialVibe thing to celebrate. Basically, if you (the reader) click on the SocialVibe box (there are two on the right side of this page - one for To Write Love On Her Arms and another for Invisible Children), and do whatever thing it asks (some kind of weird game thing?), it will donate money to whichever cause. So please, play with the gadgets, and add your own to your pages! :D
EDIT #2: When I Google the name "Norah," the three things I always find are Norah Jones, Nick & Norah's Ultimate Playlist, and (here's the strange one), a whole lot of babies/toddlers. I guess Norah is getting to be more popular of a name for little girls. Hum. I'm not really sure I like that... but yeah, just thought I'd point it out.
To sum it up? How could I even...?
Lots of tickling happened... LOTS of tickling.
My friend and her (ex) boyfriend broke up. Seeing her sad is really strange... she's such a happy person. I hope she's okay. =/ I love that girl. We might go visit her at her house this evening, if she is up for it. Her mom never texted me back about it... so I guess I shall just text her. No surprise, I suppose.
I just (like literally minutes ago) found an oldish friend on facebook. I didn't know if it was her at first, because when I knew her, she had dark brown hair, and her pictures show her to be blondish... but I'm pretty sure it is. If not... I guess I could just delete her, but I'm 99.9% sure it's her. So yay! Facebook can be quite exciting sometimes.
My (dad's) truck has a CD player! (I discovered this a few days ago!) It doesn't play burned CDs though. *cries* Oh well.
In theory, I'm going to hang out with The Boyfriend tomorrow. Yay! I love seeing him. :)
I'M GOING TO BUY A NINTENDO DS! (Or DS lite). Used, but still. Yay! I'm really excited because I've never bought anything this expensive with my own money before, and also because I really want a DS 'cause all the games look super fun. :) Yay yay yay! So hopefully sometime this week, I'll be able to do that. I'm still waiting on the checks from my mom/grandpa for various thingums. Yay, sort-of income!
I'm still waiting for jobs to call/email me or whatever, even if it's to tell me they've rejected me. No one has been very timely except for Target. Sad. Eventually, I will get a job!
I think that's it?
♥
EDIT: Apparently it's Blogger's 10th birthday! Wow. So they are using this SocialVibe thing to celebrate. Basically, if you (the reader) click on the SocialVibe box (there are two on the right side of this page - one for To Write Love On Her Arms and another for Invisible Children), and do whatever thing it asks (some kind of weird game thing?), it will donate money to whichever cause. So please, play with the gadgets, and add your own to your pages! :D
EDIT #2: When I Google the name "Norah," the three things I always find are Norah Jones, Nick & Norah's Ultimate Playlist, and (here's the strange one), a whole lot of babies/toddlers. I guess Norah is getting to be more popular of a name for little girls. Hum. I'm not really sure I like that... but yeah, just thought I'd point it out.
Sep 6, 2009
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